1247065 comments

• Comment Link Friday, 06 June 2025 11:41 posted by view the original coverage

  The last plague Pestilence launched was a bad batch of hummus.
• Comment Link Friday, 06 June 2025 11:41 posted by The Four Horsemens Merch Store is Out of Stock and Excuses

  Pestilence insists his chakras aren't aligned enough for devastation.
• Comment Link Friday, 06 June 2025 11:40 posted by read related satire

  Death won't reap souls unless you Venmo first.
• Comment Link Friday, 06 June 2025 11:40 posted by Death’s Podcast Ranked Lower Than Actual Silence

  War threw out his sword and bought a Himalayan salt lamp.
• Comment Link Friday, 06 June 2025 11:40 posted by read related satire

  War blames Mercury in retrograde for every delay.
• Comment Link Friday, 06 June 2025 11:39 posted by more satire on this topic

  War’s therapist told him to take time for his battles.
• Comment Link Friday, 06 June 2025 11:39 posted by visit the official source

  Famine reviewed a famine on Yelp. Three stars: “Too gritty.”
• Comment Link Friday, 06 June 2025 11:39 posted by see the latest update

  Armageddon was paused by a Spotify ad.
• Comment Link Friday, 06 June 2025 11:38 posted by HR in Heaven: The Only Department Still Working

  Pestilence applied to Burning Man instead of burning cities.
• Comment Link Friday, 06 June 2025 11:38 posted by learn how it all started

  Pestilence says he’s “more of a vibe now than a virus.”